Wednesday, January 04, 2006

I have seen myself in the future...

... and I don't like it one bit. I now know when you have finally turned from an adolescent to a real "adult"; it's when you stop enjoying flying and roaming around airports. I've always loved flying. I love the feeling of an airplane taking off. I love watching the clouds and the city lights. I even like airplane food. Thus far I've only associated good things to flying: tax free shopping (jumbo-sized Toblerone!), seeing new places, vacations, seeing relatives, etc. But I just realized today that in the not so distant future I might really start hating flying.

I woke up today at 4:15 and made my way to the bus station just in time before the bus left. Couldn't get any sleep, but I figured I'd have the time to doze off before my plane leaves since I was gonna be there so early. I was wrong. So very wrong.

The queues were beyond comprehension. It was as if a natural catastrophe was heading towards Finland and everybody wanted to get out. I mean it's 6:20 in the morning, WHAT THE FUCK ARE ALL OF YOU DOING HERE?!?! It took me over an hour just to get to the check-in booth. My luggage clocked an impressive 42 kilos on the scale - the penalty limit is 20 (not 23 as I had previously thought), mind you. The fee for any exceeding weight is 10 euros per kilo, so I was looking at a total penalty payment of 220€. I hadn't even gotten to France and my travel budget was about to take a huge hit. Luckily, the nice lady at the check in agreed to only charge for 10 excess kilos since I was going to France for such a long time. Yay. But this whole episode sealed the deal for me: I'm gonna ship all my sporting equipment to Finland once I start heading back. It should be a lot cheaper that way. I can't count on a nice check-in lady to bail me out a second time.

After the check-in episode I stepped in line for the security checking. The line was (again) very long but at least it was moving a bit quicker than at the check-in point. Every now and then somebody would come over and ask if they could cut in line as their plane was "just about to leave". I said "sure" the first few times but then I asked this woman I had let cut in before when her plane was leaving. 8:05, she said. A whole 15 minutes AFTER my plane was scheduled to leave. At this point I was getting a little nervous. If she's asking to cut in line so that could make her 8:05 flight, then what about my 7:50 flight? To make matters worse, an airport official came over and declared that "everybody trying to make the 7:50 flight move on to the front of the line!". Good break, you say? Guess again. EVERYBODY started rushing towards the security gate - including the woman whose plane was scheduled for later. I was getting royally pissed at that moment. This 30-something businessman asked me if I travel a lot. I said no, not really. "Well, it's like this every working morning. That's why I arrive to the airport at least two hours before the plane is scheduled to leave."

That is my future, ladies and gentlemen. I know that in the future I will have to travel a lot due to work related stuff. Seminars, company retreats, sales bids or purchasing bids. You know the deal. It's one thing to deal with all the airport bullshit when you know that you're going on vacation, but it's one thing to drag yourself out of bed at 5am just to catch a plane to some unexotic place so you can attend a seminar because your boss made you to. And before you know it you're clapping your hands along with all the other senior citizens because the captain didn't crash the plane. *shiver*

BTW, I wrote this behemoth of a post from the Copenhagen airport. I have some 4 hours to kill, so I figured I'd update my blog. Can you imagine that these savages are CHARGING for the use of WLAN? Incredible. I think WLAN-access at airports should be some sort of birthright. I know it's free in Helsinki, at least. I paid 10€ for 4 hours. Not that much, but it's the principle of the thing. Meh. At least the connection is good.

Next update once I get settled in France.

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